Features | Articles | Sissy and Eggbert Go To The Movies
Sissy
Award-winning Wolfenstein film columnist Sissy helped to shape Wolfenstein movie criticism as we know it. As co-host of "Sissy & Eggbert", Sissy and partner Eggbert have influenced and entertained millions of people with their opinions
and barbs on current Wolfenstein films, becoming part of the American entertainment culture and making their
trademark "two boney hands up/two boney hands down" a pop culture icon. A graduate of Wolfenstein University, Sissy received a bachelors
degree in Zombiology.
Eggbert
Co-host of "Sissy & Eggbert", Eggbert is a Pulitzer Prize-winning Wolfenstein film critic and has been working
for the Zombie Sun-Times since 1967. Eggbert is the author of 15 books, including "Great Wolfenstein Movies,"
"Eggbert's Wolfenstein Movie Yearbook," "I Hated, Hated, HATED This Wolfenstein Movie," the Norton anthology "Eggbert's Book of Wolfenstein Film," and the best-selling "Eggbert's Bigger Little Wolfenstein Movie Glossary".
THE 2006 EGGIE AWARDS
With the 2006 Golden Globes having just taken place this past week, Sissy & Eggbert have decided to hold their first annual Eggies, awarding videographers for excellence in the field of Wolfenstein filmography over the past year. Take a walk down the red carpet with Sissy & Eggbert as they present this year's awards!
Congratulations to all of the winners of the 2006 Eggie Awards, it was a tough decision... sort of like having the chicken or the beef... very tough, very tough indeed! Now on to this week's featured film!
Sissy: That Santa, he sure knows how to deliver the toys to the good girls 'n boys. Now here's a movie that really tickled me pink!
Eggbert: Well, zombies are sort of pinkish already. So did it really tickle you pink?
Sissy: God, just... go away please. Can't we do a single review without you asking some sort of stupid question or making some stupid remark about you stuffing your fat face?
Eggbert: WHOA NELLY! It sure is "someone's" time of the month, but to answer your question... NO! Of course you COULD hook up with that idiot Roeper! That dude couldn't tell a review from his arse. Now here's a guy who openly admits he didn't like Miss Congeniality, yet he jumps all over Humpback Mountain! Ding dong, Roeper calling, I suck!
Sissy: Wow, I didn't know you felt so strongly about being my partner here in this column. One would almost think that you... have emotions.
Eggbert: Shutup you "40 Year Old Virgin".
Sissy: Ohhh, you really know how to "Walk The Line". Alright, enough inside movie jokes here... Have you all seen "Santa Is Packing Heat"? Awesome Enemy Territory film from Nudels, a MUST watch over at GGL, taking 4th place in their holiday movie competition. Really, there's nothing more I can say, just go watch it. Two boners standing tall and firm!
Eggbert: "Roger" that big guy, I'm all over that video, well done, let's hope we haven't seen the last of Nudels. Two big, big, big (hear that ladies?) boners way up!
Sissy: Until the next time, this is Sissy and Eggbert saying... go to the movies you lazy bums!
Final Rating:
Sissy:
Eggbert:
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